funny - this'll tell you something about truth in advertising -

Imperial Palace is having a 3 day no juice poker tourney Aug 5th-7th according to my mailer - as of right now, flights to vegas are $250 and a room at the IP for two nights is $100

I could fly in Sun, play, bust out, and hang on the strip for two days - right? - except when I get down to the nitty gritty - Sun is a registration/drawing for the players - Monday is played in TWO HEATS - and Tues. is the finals/championship.

The IP tourneys have always been a little dicey - was wondering how they'd pull off a 3 day tourney - now I know :) - it's like, half a day on Monday, and probably a few hrs on Tuesday -

that's the 3 day tourney?

worst part? - I'm still thinking of going - I miss Vegas :)

rb

so I'm flipping thru the channels, and I see an old episode of Soul Train - I say old because of the predominance of afro's and the older style of clothing -

and I see the host interviewing a guy who looks suspiciously like Dr. Pauly with a 'fro.

And I see Pauly has made day two of the donkafest at the WSOP -

concidence? - if it was anyone but Dr. Pauly and Soul Train, I would dismiss it as such, but if I were to expect to see anyone from the Blogger's hall of fame on Soul Train with an afro, I would expect it to be Pauly.

Oh, he also had a thick foreign accent and was producing disco hits -

GL, Pauly
RB

the longest day of the year has passed us by - now they get shorter and gradually colder - but not nearly as cold as they'll be a few weeks after 12/21, the shortest day of the year - funny how that works.

I have a songwriter's gig on July 3rd - songwriting and poker are, I would imagine, a lot like someone I've been married to for about 50 years, and I sorta care for them and wouldn't want to see anything bad happen to them, but the passion is gone and I have no idea how to get it back.

I find myself treating online money as play money (and given the current crop of cashout issues, maybe it is) and I start/restart little contests like buying in for the mininum bankroll and trying to hop up levels till I bust out around .10/.25 cent levels -

meanwhile, kids with huge rolls are banking on the WSOP - gambling big and hoping for the score big enough they can go pro and chase the unfaithful mistress of tournament poker.

I don't know which of us is the bigger sucker, but at least I spend less :)

rb

I am tired and bummed - looking up girls I dated once on Myspace (or tried to date) - and their websites where they maintain a presence - no idea why - I wouldn't dare try to communicate with one right now -

all work and no play make whiskey a dull boy - if only flying out to Vegas wasn't so damned expensive right now -

rb

There is a Bruce Springsteen song I once posted the lyrics to here

Patty Griffin does a powerful acoustic cover of it - I just put it on repeat and rack up 50 hits in the Ipod.

There is something about the chorus I keep coming back to -

I'm driving a stolen car
down on eldridge avenue
each night I wait to get caught
but I never do

Those lines take on so many meanings for me. The guilt and fear that comes with that mindset - waiting to get busted - reminds me of why I gave up certain habits that had become destructive - It has spiritual connotations for me, as I always live my life fearing that I've let down the authorities in my life - God, family, company (usually in that order) and it is a constant fear that I will be caught by one of the few people in the world I look up to.

the last version of the chours is also something

and I'm driving a stolen car on a pitch black night
and I'm telling myself, it's gonna be alright
I drive by night, and I travel in fear
that in this darkness I will disappear.

songs like this are what made me want to become a songwriter, and I took a long detour every few years trying to get there quicker, only to find my songwriting became an expentionally more difficult effort for me - (perhaps cause I study from the best - and I want to please that muse more then anything) - it's an art form to me I want to be proud of my contribution to - I throw out so many songs and I threw one out today. It was ok, but not great - that's all - not great.

I wish I could get this album done - I wish I practiced more and had better musical chops - I've improved a little, but not to the degree of a moderately regionally respected musician. Wish I could be a songwriter like Townes was - that's all I really wanna be now. But I get so frustrated with the form I basically quit in my head every week and get dragged into it only after 50 continuous plays of a Bruce Springsteen song sung by Patty Griffin.

it consumes me to a degree I still let it interfere with my personal relationships - what a terrible thing to be chained to - and it requires proficency in both literary and musical arts - and when I get complimented on singing, for example, I don't feel as half as good as when i've been complimented for the songwriting.

wonder if I still have a gig in july - Chris needs to get back to me.

and I'm driving a stolen car on a pitch black night
and I'm telling myself, it's gonna be alright
I drive by night, and I travel in fear
that in this darkness I will disappear.

rb

been a few days - what's happening? Been mostly putting the music posts on the myspace page now, but I did get my 12-string.

saw an 80's cover band last week - the most noticable part of that was the herd of 25 cowgirls that came in for a bachelorette party - I noticed a couple in particular would have nothing to do with me despite my nice new short haircut - I have GOT to start drinking again :( - this whole thing about the taylor hicks hair being a chick magnet is full of shit :)

to make it worse, I'm actually going to church again - no comment there

meh - I'm just drifting - warm summer.

rb