I wanna talk a bit more about M, as I'll call him....cause upon reading my previous posts, I know I sounded a bit judgemental, which wasn't even close to what I wanted.

He went to Mardi Gras every year, and came back with a ton of beads and gifts for folks -

He had two daughters - and he was 53 -

He seemed like a guy who had a lot of fun when he was younger - had the pierced ears - the leather and the wild hat - he looked like a Harley rider as well. He had a twin brother who I never met -

Apparently, a couple months ago, he stumbled upon the body of his friend in an apt. and after that, it seemed he sorta slid a bit further away - amongst those of us who knew him.

He had the same demon I'm afraid I'm catching - love of alcohol - it's sorta like a woman you know you shouldn't love but do anyways even though she ruins your life - I don't think it caught up with him until the last 3-4 yrs. of his life, but I dunno - I've only been here for two years.

I can only wonder what he was doing/thinking - if he went on a binge and his death was accidental (his body was pretty wore out, I guess) or if he took his own life - in the end, it doesn't matter. I suspect he would have rather lived on given a choice, but if he did, he didn't think he had one anymore.

And he's buried a scant mile as the crow flies from me. I'm gonna swing thru there after work at 8am when it opens - leave him a poker chip or something - he'd probably like that better then flowers - I suppose the poetic thing to do would be to buy a pint of whiskey and pour it in the dirt over his grave.....

but I'm not going to do that....you will never have to worry about that viper chasing you ever again. It will never tempt you or tear you in two directions or burn your soul or take anything else from you ever again. It will leave you alone now.

Rest in Peace, M.

RB